I’m back! I promised I’d be (somewhat) consistent and even though you may have seen some of these images on the gram, I wanted to post them here too because I’m really proud of them. I’ve been blogging for ages and it’s only recently that I’ve been intentionally making more of an effort to work on my branding. I really want to be identified in a particular way so I’m using all of my means to ensure that said identification is brought into fruition!

I had a therapy session with my ‘life coach’ Jackie on Monday and boy oh boy. I didn’t expect unpacking years of trauma and unreleased emotional tension would feel like this. The feeling of sickness that came with it was something that I was so incredibly unprepared for it made me nervous. I never realised how much of a heavy burden I’ve been carrying for such a long time but I’m glad that I’m actively working on its release.

After the session, I had to cancel my whole day because I felt like I had lost so much energy from the counselling. In a way, I’m glad I took some time out because I spent a lot of the day reflecting and for some reason I cast my mind back to the day I got saved. That day was also another intense day and maybe the feeling I had after therapy was so akin to the feeling I had that day, the memories resurrected by default.

The day I got saved was a very heavy day but I remember crying profusely and just feeling so broken but also full of gratitude that God had come into my life in a way I had never experienced. I remember speaking to one of the church members and she asked me why I was crying uncontrollably and I told her that I wasn’t happy with what I was doing occupationally. At the time I was working part (basically full) time at Waitrose and my blog was a slow burner and I just knew I had more to offer to the world creatively. I really REALLY wanted to be a stylist and I knew it could be a possibility but at the time it seemed more idealistic than realistic.

It feels like so many moons ago but it’s crazy to think that that was once my situation. I was crying and begging and pleading with God to do the very thing that I do daily now. It’s crazy to look back and my own testimony and see how life has a very funny way of working itself out!

Life happens in such a gradual way that it’s very easy to forget how you once longed for the very things you have now. For a long time, I was so focused on the things that I didn’t have that the things that I did have took a back seat in such a major way and I wasn’t practising gratitude. Growing up as kids, we’re always taught to say our pleases and thank yous and how important it is to be grateful but I only discovered the power of gratitude halfway through this year. When you are truly grateful, your blessings will surely multiply.

So even though I was styling people I admired and I was taking on interior projects that I dreamed off and I was collaborating with massive brands that I once thought would overlook me I was always looking for the next. The next pay cheque the next gig the next project. I never took time out to sit back and congratulate myself on my accomplishments or genuinely thank God for the things that were happening to and for me.

I don’t know what happened but there was a massive shift in me and suddenly I started to actually be grateful. I stopped chasing the next thing starting praising and worshipping God for the things he had already done as well as what he was yet to do and guess what happened? My blessings multiplied tenfold. I was seeing things happening in my life I could never dream of. Making five figures a month? Not having to financially worry about things? Being genuinely happy for myself and for others? Working on and achieving new dreams that I didn’t even think I had in me? All these things were happening and they weren’t just too good to be true, they were good and they were true.

I stayed focused on myself and my support system and didn’t let any noise infiltrate what I had going on and honestly life has been blissful. I’m not saying I haven’t struggled at all because bitch, new levels new devils but, I’m just saying that things really did take a turn for the positive. I say all this to say that whatever you have in your heart, it can and will flourish and soon become something in your palms. It can become real. Self-belief is the difference between making it or not. We sometimes set ourselves up for failure by creating unrealistic goalposts and wanting things to happen on our terms. Trust me, they will happen and when they happen, it’ll be beyond anything you could ever dream of!

 

Blazer – Zara

Shirt – House Of CB

Skirt – House of CB

Shoes – Balenciaga

Earrings – Alessandra Rich

  • Foreverfaith16x

    This is such a timely blog post and a very touching story. In the midst of wanting and desiring things, it’s also really important to sit back and simply say “thank you” to God for everything. I’m also curious Melissa, what are your thoughts on the Law of Attraction?