Accesibility

12th Dec 15

17 Comments

Take a breather, Mate.

Rant – Sometimes I just feel like I’ve become too damn available. I can wholeheartedly concluded that about a generous 90% of my day is spent online – either working or for social reasons. Which means either my phone or a device that has some kind of communication portal is occupied by my hands or my mind and you know what I AM BLOODY TIRED OF IT.

I’m tired of going to dinner and picking up my phone to scroll aimlessly through some dumbass app without actually trying to enjoy my time with the company I’m with. I’m tired of the person that I’m dining with succumbing to their phone addiction too.

I’m tired of seeing people holding up their phones to document a moment rather than dwelling in it – these days if you look at wedding/party photo’s (taken by professional photographer) 90% of the crowd will be holding up some kinda smart device to capture said moment which in fact makes the professional pictures look weird – I’m really starting to wonder if this is why people ban phones at their weddings.

I’m tired of people getting annoyed or thinking that I’m dead because I haven’t answered a text/snapchatted/tweeted or something or other within the last hour – It’s not imperative for me to ALWAYS be available to you. Sometimes I like get my thoughts together or even better sometimes I don’t want to talk to anyone at all so naff off, mate! I’m not being rude I’m just making more efforts to be in tune with myself.

The latter  complaint however can somewhat be described as my own fault because I have always been a quick replier as I never like to keep people hanging. So now that I’m trying to yield myself off this achieved habit, people are becoming slightly irritated at my ‘slow’ responses. Technology is really starting to scare me, not only that but how much we divulge in it and allow it to invade our privacy scares me. On top of it all, being addicted to my phone is scaring me even more.

I’m scared that I’m loosing touch with the good parts of the world and not enjoying the moments that I should be cherishing. I’m scared that my conversational skills are slowly diminishing because I’ve created a terrible habit of filling awkward conversational silences with pressing my home button to see if that dickhead boy has texted me back or stalking someone’s whats app to see if they’re really offline or just ignoring my messages. I. AM. TIRED.

I’m definitely not a victim, if anything, I’m a willing participant and I really need to find a way to stop being so connected to the world and start being more connect to other things that have real value and longevity. I want to use the time I spend aimlessly scrolling through the internet to read books, develop a mesmerising vocabulary, learn new things that I’ve never even knew could exist, talk to my friends and explore deeper parts of their being and actually flipping enjoy living life like the older generation had the chance to.

With all this being said we’ll see how well this works… After all, all addictions have withdrawal symptoms.

P.S – Thank you for all the lovely messages about my writing style/articles/topics of conversation. I’ve never been the most articulate or academic person so it means so much to me to be commended by you guys. For too long I have been mentally  barricaded by the aimless results of silly tests and sometimes it can put a dampen on ones self esteem but to be told that I’m good means the world to me so THANK YOU!

 

(Also. Yes, my belly looks a bit swollen in these pics. Fibroids are a bitch and that’s just the reality of it!)

Coat – Zara

Jumpsuit – Zara

Boots – Ego Official

  • I feel you girl, the rate at which technology is taking over our lives is alarming. I’m tired of people hanging out and playing with their phone rather than having an actual conversation. I can honestly say I’m slowing weaning my self of this phone addiction, being back home is Nigeria with less access to the net is definitely helping. Also I agree with everyone else, you’re a great writer and I love your topic choices.

    Princess Audu

    • melswardrobe

      Isn’t it just!! I don’t even think people know how to converse for longer than 30 mins without looking at a screen anymore. Ah living in Nigeria must be lovely! I’m would love to visit some day. Thanks so much for the compliments and well wishes, Sarah. Let me know how you rid of your addiction lol xx

  • ♥Chuqqie♥

    OMG! Melisa I thought about you today and I was thinking about how I started following your blog 2012/2013 ish and it’s been amazing to see how much you have evolved your style, your personality, your writing. This is mind blowing I havr been enjoying your recent posts, because I feel like you are speaking to me and this just Hut the nail on the head am tired of been tired of social media am crazy addicted, it’s Exhausting anyway rant over. I hope your health gets better and YES you are an amazing writer and you don’t need any tests to validate you. Much love.

    • melswardrobe

      Omds that’s so nice that I came across your thoughts! It’s so nice to speak to day one supporters. Thanks so much and I’m glad you’re enjoying the content and relating to it. I’m also very tired of social media and I’m tired of my addiction to it. I can’t wait to be free! Thanks so much for the well wishes xxx

  • I couldn’t agree more! It gets frustrating but then you realise that just because you don’t wanna be on your phone at a social event doesn’t mean that others don’t want to. And when you see others on their phones you want to do the same, it’s the toxic loop our generation has gotten ourselves into

    Agnes x

    http://www.blvckbee.com

    • melswardrobe

      Catch 22 right!! loool it’s crazy but definitely trying to ween myself off of it. Hope you’re well xx

  • helen

    Aww hun, you don’t need any one’s validation, you excellent just the way you are, i suffer from fibroid too and underwent an operation to have them removed in 2012, only to told they are coming back, i actually got tired of being complimented on being pregnant when i wasnt am on a health and exercise journey right now. BTW i love your fashion sense, you are in a class of your own, i can shamelessly say i copy loads 4rm you

    • melswardrobe

      Thank you so much Helen! They always come back it’s so nasty. I thought I had mine removed during my surgery and my Doctor told me that he left them there because they’ll grow back so it’s pointless. It’s crazy how no matter how tiny they are, they can bloat you sooooo much! It’s annoying when you have to take pictures for the blog as well. I was tempted to photoshop them out but I don’t think it would be fair to girls like you if I distorted my reality which really is a reality a few of us commonly share! I always vowed that I would photoshop so I’m sad that I considered it! I’m as real as anyone else so I’m glad I kept and uploaded my bloated pics! I’m so happy you’re inspired by me and feel free to copay whenever you want! You could even email me your outfit pics info@melissaswardrobe.com xx

  • Ms M.

    Girl you look great, I didn’t even notice the fibroids, schmibroids. I’m a bit older than you but smart phones has never really been my thing. I’d like to say it was because I wanted to be more in tune with my peoples, which is definitely true, but the main reason? I was just too lazy and cheap to buy a smartphone. So about 2 years after the world was immersed…I got one. And that was because I was travelling. One of the worst dates I had ever been on, the guy stayed on his iphone. I thought he wasn’t interested in me…until he kept texting me non-stop. Over it.

    You gave me an idea if I ever get married. Good lookin’ out.

    • melswardrobe

      Aww
      thank you so much. I love your little background story lol That sounds like the
      worlds worst dates. I honestly would have just gone home WTF? I can’t believe
      that he even had the cheek to text you non-stop after. What and embarrassment!
      Yeah, I’ve definitely decided that there will be a no phones policy at my
      wedding. Everyone will have to find another way to enjoy
      themselves

  • MyChicStyle

    Develop a mesmerising vocabulary (I love that). I love this post and I agree wholeheartedly. I am a victim of fibroids too… It’s a beast….

    • melswardrobe

      Small things like vocab can elevate your intellect! so glad you enjoyed the post! I mean, how annoying are fibroids? Do you know anyway to lessen the bloating? Would love some tips xx

      • MyChicStyle

        I have been fighting fibroids for years. I find that probiotics help with bloating. Also, I take lots of herbal supplements too (primrose oil, etc). Try to find this book, “Prescription for Nutritional Healing”. It will give you a host of things to take to aid with fibroid growth, etc. Hope that helps xoxo.

  • This post is amazing. I really enjoyed it x Thank you for sharing

    Jac Fleurant
    http://www.herwearabouts.com

    • melswardrobe

      Thanks so much, Jac xxx

  • Joey Taylor

    Loved this rant, I had the same feeling over the holidays and actually took a break away from documenting every last moment of the holidays and posting it on social media, instead just enjoyed the moment! BTW love the jumpsuit, really suits your figure. x

    http://www.northernmagpie.com

  • Ugonna

    LOL! Girl this is why I love you, your rants are always fleeky. But for real this has been me all January, I have wondered why social media is trying to take over my life. Last Saturday, I made a conscious decision to unplug and the next day I ordered a couple of books from Barnes and Nobles because life is too short to be scrolling every day. I am really getting scared of technology and the addiction that comes with it. You barely even have time to admire things around you, it is always almost about capturing the moment for people to see. Two days ago, someone text me saying “check your snapchat” I’m like “I’m off that app for a while” and they found it so ridiculous that I could leave snapchat. Yesterday, some one else text me saying I have been trying to reach you to no avail and I was like I did not get a call or text and they go I have been sending snapchats to you. Lol! What has life really become. Maybe I am even losing my face to face conversational skill because “social media”. I hate this a lot and the fact that people don’t see this makes me sad although it is really difficult. I am that person that likes to be in touch with myself but these days I can barely have meaningful conversations with people because it is all about what this person posted or what that person said on social media. *rolls eyes
    I don’t even get to miss my friends because I always know what they are up to, if that makes sense lol! So even if I haven’t seen them in so long and I finally get to see them I don’t get that “ooh shit I really missed you” feeling

    I think it is possible to unplug, I tried it for a whole year with twitter and it worked fine because when I redownloaded the app and when I tried to type a tweet I’d always ask myself “is that really necessary, don’t you have better things to do” lmao! Although I still tweet, I don’t dwell there anymore as much as I usually would. I don’t know if that came with growing older or the fact that I unplugged for that long. I want to believe the latter. Same goes for snapchat and instagram, whenever I disconnect and come back I don’t really feel the need to stalk people as much as I usually would or watch the same snapchats over and over because I have tried to spend time without them and I have learnt new things to do with my time. I guess it is all about mindset. So yes my darling! This just goes to say “I am feeling this rant a whole lot” lol!.

    Btw you look great and those fibroids ain’t shit cuz you’re still popping! Glad you didn’t alter the pictures, you are awesome like that! And that outfit is great of course.

    Lots of love, darling.
    http://www.yourstrulyugo.com