The Journey Is The Destination
Photos By Sylwia Bagazinska I had a conversation with a friend recently that was orientated around everything in life, money, travel, boys (or lack of) but our main topic of conversation was about where we were headed occupationally. For the life of me I wanted to be a fashion stylist. I knew I was good…
Photos By Sylwia Bagazinska
I had a conversation with a friend recently that was orientated around everything in life, money, travel, boys (or lack of) but our main topic of conversation was about where we were headed occupationally. For the life of me I wanted to be a fashion stylist. I knew I was good at pairing clothes together. I could see and understand clothes in a different way to my peers. I just felt like I was good at creating outfits that told a story that was easily interpretable by everyone and wanted to create editorials and images that reflected this. Later on in life I realised that the dream that I had envisioned for myself was just that – a dream and I would soon find out that life isn’t always that simple…
Most of you know I studied criminology which is so far from fashion but my Mum told me that she didn’t think that fashion would work out in the way that I had dreamt and I should have something to fall back on. For the life of me I used to think my mum was being a typical African parent wanting to be academic when I had a creative mind. I couldn’t understand why I had to study something that I knew I would fail at because I thought I wasn’t clever enough. I kept thinking to myself ‘How?’ when I have photographic memory and dream in song and have creative visions (or daydreams) so HOW could I study such a boring subject that my mind simply couldn’t comprehend?
You know that saying ‘Mum’s always right’? well, 9/10 that ish be true. My mum was right and university was the best experience of my life. I met so many great people I met my soul-best friend Roberta and I got my heart broken a few times (not just by boys but by bad ass exam results that I studied so hard for) but, it taught me so much about myself and a little about life. With saying this, I think it was only about a year after I graduated from uni (age 22) that I felt I understood who I was as a person, you know? I think that was the time that I began to be okay with being ‘Melissa’ as well as my beauty, body and height – all things that once upon a time made me somewhat insecure. I realised that I was beautiful and I stopped putting myself down for not being as clever as the next person. I also came to realise that I actually couldn’t give as much of a hoots for fashion as much as I though I did. There were so many factors that constituted to me not being as in love with fashion (the last straw was getting declined after a fashion buying interview for Browns Fashion) but it was mainly one thing that my mum said that resonated with me.
Randomly my mum called me and says ‘Mel, I know you so well and I’ve come to the conclusion that you just like to look good. You don’t love fashion as much as you think you do. You like to look good and you like things that are aesthetically pleasing’. When she said that, I literally just laughed because it was so true! I have a love for so many things. I have so many skills and hobbies that are all connected to creating things that are aesthetically pleasing. From cooking, to eating to applying make up to decorating homes, blogging and even photography – I relish in things with good presentation. After this conversation, I released that I need to create a career and lifestyle that I thoroughly enjoyed by using all of my skills to generate a stable income for myself. I’m starting to believe that the key to a good career and a great life these days is to somehow monetize all of your skills. It is so important and our generation has created so many opportunities for itself in the simplest of ways (refer to fashion blogging as an example!). Anything is possible.
I just remember after Uni when I felt so behind because my friends were getting good jobs and I just felt like I was inadequate because the fashion would wouldn’t accept me for me. I also felt like people expected me to be doing well and even my blog readers thought I had such an amazing life but that wasn’t the case because I generally wasn’t happy. Now, at 24 years old, I can truly say that I am happy with the person that I am right now. I don’t know where I’m heading career wise, but I am making memorable moves that will bring me to where I need to be in life and I’m so sure that my life will be a great one. In fact, life is pretty darn great right now! I just hope that I start to believe in myself more and stop comparing myself to others as much as I have done in the past. I think I will be heading in the right direction if I continue to focus on becoming the woman that I want to be.
This post was just really for me to reflect on where I have come from because I so regularly feel like I am standing still when the world is rushing around me. I need to remind myself that just because my success (in any form) comes later than everyone elses doesn’t mean it’s not success or that it’s inadequate. I hope this little post helps you to understand a little bit more of my (summarized) journey and I hope I can share more parts of me with you soon!
Quick question; Do you like more personal, sometimes unrelated-to-the-outfit rambles for me or should I still to the simple fashion jargon? Please let me know!
Also, a book that has really motivated me to make the best of life as well as any given situation is #GirlBoss by Sophia Amoruso get it HERE it will change your life in a good way, I promise.
Jacket – Zara
Choker – River Island
Jeans – Zara
Socks – ASOS
Shoes – Christian Louboutin (Will be purchasing!)